THE MULTIVERSE THAT IS MY MIND

I haven't really written on this blog for quite sometime now. It used to be, when I first started this, I wrote often, and often about what I thought about in my personal life. I haven't really had the urge to update, mainly because of time constraints and honestly, I just lost interest. In no way do I plan to make daily, nor weekly updates like before but... this is a good medium to just let go and say or post whatever I want.

Well a lot has changed since the Irvine days. I really miss the nonchalant, carefree attitude that accompanied my persona back then. Class, work, beer, XBox, gym, then bar practically every night. That was the routine. And it was awesome. But as busy as I kept myself back then with work, school, and volunteering, it really doesn't come close to what my schedule is like these days. Going to class, having the energy to participate or do the work, it's starting to take its toll. But in a odd way, I like it. I like the feeling of not having enough time. It gets shit done.

I don't think I've ever stacked my life with this much responsibility or this much.. I don't know, stuff. I'm taking 5 classes this semester, which by the way are 3 hours long a piece... some seem longer than the others. I teach two labs that meet twice a week (thus meeting a marathon-like 4x a week). I intern at UCLA working with addicts and helping out with developing some treatment program; which is actually fun, but I probably put more work into that than my own classes, which is no bueno. I do feel the density of the work starting to take its toll on me, but I didn't thought it showed. But the past couple weeks, professors, students, and even classmates have said "I look out of it", "stressed out about something", "you look a bit pale these days", and I even got "I don't understand why you are dozing off in my class?" WTF?? I was not dozing off! I'm just tired and your 3.5 hour lecture isn't helping, you peck peck. I mean if people are commenting on it, I guess I must be out of it lately. Eesh...

But I am content, for once, with what I have going on. Before it was all about girls, girls, girls then fun, fun, fun. Then it became about money, money, money, then momentarily: art, culture, art. And to an extent, I still like thinking about those things. But the one thing I am happy about with what I am doing right now with my life, at least at my POV right now, is that it looks a bit more .. fulfilling I guess you could say. I still don't know what I want out of all these activities that I do, but I do feel that it is, or at the very least, seems worthwhile. And with that tiny bit of satisfaction, I can go to sleep at night, even it is for just a few hours.

Soo.. yeah I don't know what this was about, but just to share I guess, that I am doing OK. Bang!